I have no air of mystery about me because I yap too much

Ever since I could remember, I've wanted to be mysterious. I want people to think I am weird but in a cool way. But this is not really possible, because I tend to overshare and yap too much about myself especially online. I mean I run this blog for example, and there's no way anyone would think of it as mysterious. Also sometimes I try to say stuff that sounds mysterious, but people figure it out instantly. For example I tried to come up with weird allegories to ask people stuff. I asked my friend if he would rather die of dehydration or of drinking poisoned water and he saw right through me and was like "you're just trying to ask if being alone forever or being in a toxic relationship is worse." Yeah that's really what it was. I'm sorry I couldn't be deeper than that. Or one time I asked someone if she would feel bad for a guy if he gets eaten by tigers in a forest in Bangladesh after some Bangladeshi villagers warned him about man-eating tigers and told him to stay away from the forest. Would you feel bad for someone like that, or would you just say they are stupid for not heeding the warning?? The person I asked about this figured out I meant would you still feel bad for a person if they dated or befriended someone who everyone warned them would be bad for them. People see through my allegories. I'm not mysterious enough. I think mysterious people are supposed to dress in all black all the time but I don't do that either. Also I like yapping too much to be mysterious. 

Being mysterious seems like something a lot of people would aspire to be, but I wonder if anyone has really achieved it. I guess deleting your social media helps or making sure you don't have pictures of yourself online. But how do people seem more mysterious irl? Not yapping much, just lingering? But also, this may be seen as weird or creepy!! We're trying to figure out how to be seen as mysterious, not suspicious. Being mysterious is alluring, not off-putting! 

But how long can you maintain an air of mystery for? Even if you succeed in becoming mysterious, are people going to keep seeing you that way if they get close to you? Is it possible to know someone well for years and still see them as mysterious? 

Perhaps being mysterious is not really a goal worth pursuing, but that's been a hard pill to swallow for me. I've wanted to achieve it for so long, but I need to accept that I am bad at it. And maybe that's a good thing. It's one of those things where you would have to larp really hard to be it, and it won't reflect your true self. So it will get exhausting to keep up the larp after some time. Mysterious people can't yap, gossip, or be cringe. But they also can't do a lot of things that are actually positive, fun or harmless behaviors. For example: mysterious people can't express affection, can't create art if it looks too whimsical and colourful (serious portrait sketches and stuff like that is okay), can't change up the way they dress, can't use a wide range of facial expressions, can't go wild at a party, etc. It may be better to be passionate, affectionate and free than to be mysterious.